Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
this just has baby written all over it
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
