By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
