we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
She's not a foreskin expert like you
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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