You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
