Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize