We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
