Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
