question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize
