what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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