i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
