I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
