First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
