"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
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You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
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As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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