two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
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