....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize