and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Randomize
