While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize