Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
are you so shy because you have an std?
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
