sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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