READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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