he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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