we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Randomize
