yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
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Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
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Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high