jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
