i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
is that a dick in a sweater?
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
my penis made a compromise with my morals
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
