We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
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For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
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So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities