Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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