sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Randomize
