he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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