i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
