it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize
