If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
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he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
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You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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