Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
