I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
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