Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
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