We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
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