well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
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