I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
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