i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I didn't notice because vodka
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
