Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize