There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Randomize