Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize
