i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize