Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
How drunk are you?