Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
