Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
There's always time for handjobs
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
