You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
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she looked like the before picture.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
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So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there