I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
