Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
