What a fucking waste of an outfit
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
FUCK WHALES
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
