There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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